Carbon Credits are the Emperor's Clothes

Al Gore may not have invented the internet, but I wouldn't be surprised if he had a hand in creating this modern snake oil scam. Perhaps a hidden financial interest in this eco-deception would explain his quixotic fervor about global warming...?

Selling Carbon offsets?
The idea that some entity will collect your money to mitigate your shameful destruction of Mother Earth (for using too much energy), and could offset the affect of your "carbon footprint", by shifting your burden onto someone else (like this poor slob-->
who's under-consuming would be an
ingenious scam, if it weren’t so
ridiculously fraudulent on it’s face.

For starters, who the hell would presume they have the authority to absolve someone of profligate energy consumption? And who’d be dumb enough to acknowledge such a haughty claim? (Ooh- sorry, Arnold!)
Why believe some foolish organization that says they have the authority to issue carbon credits and to sell carbon offsets to assuage your liberal tree-hugging, earth-worshipping guilt for living in the modern world, and not like it was 1845?

Here’s some flim-flam from the TerraPass website offering to help you save the earth by selling you some snakeoil in the form of guilt-reducing blue sky :
1."Each year, the average car emits about 10,000 lbs (three times its weight!) in carbon dioxide pollution – a leading cause of global warming." (First they instill the fear & guilt.)
2."You buy a Road TerraPass." (Next, they offer you simple absolution--for only $29.95 a year!)
3."TerraPass funds clean energy projects that reduce carbon dioxide emissions." (Then they tell you how the scam’s supposed to help Mother Earth.)
4."Your TerraPass is third-party verified to reduce the equivalent of your car’s carbon dioxide pollution." (Welllll, just so long as it’s "3rd-party verified", then I guess everything’s just hunky-dory, eh?)

And just look at the really cool stuff you get for only $29.95!:
"Your member kit includes:
"TerraPass window decal. A static cling decal for the window of your car that shows how much you have reduced your impact." (And how gullible you are.)
"TerraPass bumper sticker. Be loud and proud." (Uh-oh, Queer Nation may sue them for stealing that phrase!)
"TerraPass clear decal. A clear decal featuring the TerraPass logo. Looks great on tinted windows." (Like the ones on Al Gore's gas-guzzling limo.)

And, this is how your penance-fees are supposed to turn into Earth-saving action:
"Your TerraPass purchase supports clean energy projects. When you buy a TerraPass, you sponsor a guaranteed reduction in carbon dioxide emissions."
For example:
"An entrepreneurial wind farmer receives funds to expand his plant." (And to kill more birds!)
"A small dairy farmer gets capital to install digesters on his farm to control methane emissions." (Can't we just feed the cows Beano?)
"Using financial instruments such as carbon credits, your funds result in guaranteed reductions." (Gauranteed by whom?)

I wonder if I could get away with selling vampire insurance...?
More analogous would be the sale of Pedophile Points to child molestors, as a way of easing guilty consciences and offsetting the damage they've inflicted upon innocent children. The PedoPass Company would determine the personal and communal impact (a "fondling footprint"?) of various offenses, and then sell the offenders a proportionate amount of Pedophile Points. The money would be invested in Boy's and Girl's Clubs of America, Big Brothers/Big Sisters, etc., and used to help create safe places and relationships for children to experience.
And just like the Carbon Credits scam, the offenders wouldn't have to actually change their behavior, they simply pay a fee, get a nice little window decal, and carry on with their wonton ways; cleansed of their guilt by knowing that somebody else is going to treat some other child with care and compassion.

Brad